Lol and behold

Science is weird and wonderful.

Science made us realise that if you ate five portions of fruit and veg a day,  it reduces the risk of cancer by 50%. And science told us that actually it’s just 2.5%. Well, I guess it’s the taking part that matters.

The wild swing is hardly a surprise though; people are notoriously squishy and wobbly, and not only literally but also as subjects of scientific examination  It isn’t fair to medical scientists. Astronomers can be much more laid back about their subjects, the object that appears to move four times faster than light in the galaxy M82 isn’t going to kick up a fuss when astronomers describe it with the words “We don’t know what it is”. They can give their papers titles more befitting to a Victorian horror story, like “The shocking size of Comet McNaught”. They can even propose that a dwarf planet be called Rupert. (Okay, they haven’t done that last one, but they could’ve done it.)

But undoubtedly environmental scientists have it the worst. Not only do they have to cope with immense political pressure and public expectations, their subject appears to be simple to everyone but them. I mean, how hard can it be to watch the thermometers, then plot a line between the data points? They also have to be very serious about their job, they can’t even reduce the pressure with a joke. The death of our beloved planet is no laughing matter after all.

No wonder it came as a shock to them when they found out.that the thawing of nitrous oxide deposits is faster than previously estimated. So the bad news is that we’re all gonna die, but at least we’ll be able to see the funny side of it.


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